"Jojo, young traveler, are you strong enough to endure THE ORGERON RECURSION? 'Tis an awful thing, this hypnotic oiled devil - avert your eyes lest you be pulled into a chasm of sucking mediocrity! Not even your Hummer can extract you from this pit of SEC despair!"     After a rowdy, sweaty game of of "Hungry Hungry Wild Boyz," Coach O opened a folding table before his Wild Boyz and filled a blender with 2 cans of Mountain Dew, one 9-volt battery, a cup of Folger's grounds, a Brach's butterscotch, a jigger of Drano, a can of TaB, a serrano chili, and a live ferret. He blended the whole thing together and quaffed the awful mess, which stank like the Fulmer. Within seconds, Coach O began to pupate, actually surrounding himself with a hard larval pulsating shell. About 18 Manningminutes later, the shell began to hiss and ooze a thick unguent, and the shell opened to reveal Coach O but he had no shirt and he was real fired up. He ate a handful of scorpions and then broke an equipment manager's femur, then began to lecture his team about the hated LSU Tigers. This shot was taken right as he started talking about JaMarcus. It's so refreshing when Crimson Tide week has passed; the bloat and discomfort are so unpleasant. "Are you there, God? It's me, MikeShula. If you could make us not suck, that would be awesome." Having to play and beat down the Tide is simply our burden to...um...Bear. Onward! HAPPIEST OF JOYS, BOYS! It's Ye Ole Miss week and Baton Rouge is set to be invaded by the Forces of Khaki, with their ruddy polos and luscious Panola locks bursting from beneath their weathered caps; tendrils of hair flick in the Tiger Stadium air like the quick flames of a truck of chickens that Coach Orgeron destroyed last Howler's Moon. Also that evening, an entire pen of pigs was disemboweled by what the farmer called a "drunken hairtornado made of razors;" strangely enough, the runts were spared. The2003 West Co-Champion Rebels and their minotaur/coach are riding high after a series of close losses this season, proving to the Rebel faithful that while the Rebs can still lose with the best of 'em, they don't get blown out all the time anymore it's only sometimes and that's when they lose focus no seriously some of these have been good and boy can Coach recruit but yeah it's a bit weird the way his nostrils flare when someone uses the phrase "organ meats." There's no shortage of bellicosity in this matchup, though the contentiousness has waned in recent years, thanks to the healing salve of Coach O and his Wild Boyz. A constant source of amusement, fiery Coach Ogrewrong and his bumbling band of nullities make for more funners, what with his "yeah, I just huffed a mason jar of industrial solvent, so what?" voice, bulging trunk, and PeteCarroll musk. Lest you think that these sentiments are too harsh, forget not that the Rebels eschewed a 9-3 offensive mind for Lou Ferrigno. Not just normal Ferrigno...nay, this is Ferrigno after 20 reps of maxed out preacher curls with a few Viagara and Mini-Thins and some Red Bull and a bucket of Subway meatballs. WILD BOYZ LOSE WITH RAGE! In name, The Trough is close enough discomfort to The Grove, the "most magical place in all of football." That is of course if by "magic" you mean getting pickled on cheap hooch in the forest preserve with Hiram and Sussie, eating mayonnaise-and-french-onion (got to use Lipton's and add some pimento) dip while seeing how many times the phrase "Go to Hell" can leave your slacked aperture. Abracadabra, fools! "For our next trick, we'll take a highly-recruited quarterback and turn him into a fullback! Shazam! Now watch us vanish in a violent flash, never to be relevant again!" LSU's ferocious defense and cruising offense must be looking forward to pulling one more Jenga! block out of Ole Miss' tower of suck, though LSU might not have to do much work - maybe just ease back and let Coach Berzerker knock down the whole mess himself. The Egg Bowl is right around the corner - good thing, because the Tigers are bringing all the sausage this weekend. The Rebels were hoping to poultice the gaping wound of mediocrity by picking up, begging, groveling, sniffling, and likely openly weeping for Volslough quarterback Brent Schaeffer, who came to Oxford after completing his coursework at College of the Sequoias, whose logo is simply Coach O's left leg. Everyone knows that you can tell the age of a tree by cutting a cross section...if Coach O were a tree, would it be safe to say that he's no longer growing? It's not like he's going to get any more rings. Tripping Mannings, 3 Crushing Lavalais, 42 Welcome to The Trough, a place that really gets to the meat of LSU's opponents. Ok, not so much the meat, but the sinewy gristle and thick connective tissue. We then feed these funbits through a grinder to get a coarse meaty bounty, and that's what is on display here. It should be a given that while The Trough is loosely related to LSUChicageaux.com, it's more like a Baton Rouge uncle than a Tuscaloosa cousin. In other words, what's in The Trough is obviously not endorsed by any official LSU entity. They've got better sense than that.